what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
