what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
