Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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