what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
