Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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