But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
