it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
