The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
