no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Randomize
