I can't open my eyes
Lol why not?
Because I have fat ankles and I'm drunk
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize