3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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