3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
