when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Randomize
