Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
We talked him into tasing himself.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
