i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
