READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Randomize
