these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Randomize
