Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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