So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
