He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
