The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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