Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Randomize
