I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Randomize
