Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
