You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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