Already got asked if we're dating
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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