My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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