I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Randomize
