90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
Randomize
