I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Randomize
