I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
