But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
