My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
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