Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Randomize
