i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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