I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize