We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
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