Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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