Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
