ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
