I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
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