She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
