Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Randomize
