love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Randomize
