Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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