11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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