Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
