dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Vodka?
Forever.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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