Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Randomize
