im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
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